Transactional Interactions in Buber’s Perspective

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By Boris Carmi /Meitar Collection / National Library of Israel / The Pritzker Family National Photography Collection, CC BY 4.0, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=112952195

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Martin Buber would understand transactional interactions as relationships that fall into the I-It category—where people treat each other as objects, tools, or means to an end rather than as full, unique human beings.

1. Definition of Transactional Interactions (I-It Relationships)

  • A transactional interaction occurs when one engages with another person solely to achieve a specific goal, gain a benefit, or fulfill a function, without truly seeing or valuing them as a whole person.
  • In these interactions, efficiency, usefulness, or outcomes matter more than genuine connection.

Key Characteristics of Transactional (I-It) Interactions:

✅ Impersonal & Functional: The other person is seen in terms of their role, function, or what they can provide.
✅ Conditional & Temporary: The relationship exists only as long as there is an exchange of value.
✅ Lack of Presence: People interact without deep engagement or real listening.
✅ Objectification of the Other: The person is treated as a means rather than an end in themselves.

2. Examples of Transactional Interactions in Daily Life

  • Workplace Interactions: A manager only acknowledges an employee when asking for a task to be completed, without caring about their well-being.
  • Customer-Service Dynamics: A customer treats a waiter or cashier as invisible, only engaging for the transaction.
  • Superficial Social Exchanges: Networking events where people only interact to advance their career rather than forming real relationships.
  • Conditional Friendships: A person only reaches out to a friend when they need a favor but never engages in meaningful conversation.

Buber’s Perspective:

  • Transactional relationships are not inherently bad—some I-It interactions are necessary in daily life (e.g., buying groceries, conducting business).
  • However, when all or most relationships become transactional, life becomes shallow and disconnected, leading to alienation and a loss of meaning.

3. Why Are Transactional Interactions Problematic?

  • They erode the richness of human relationships by reducing people to roles.
  • They prevent genuine dialogue and human transformation (which only occurs in I-Thou relationships).
  • They reinforce isolation and instrumental thinking, making relationships mechanical rather than meaningful.

Buber’s Warning:

  • If people live entirely in an I-It world, they become spiritually empty, seeing life as a series of transactions rather than a web of meaningful connections.
  • This leads to alienation, both from other people and from the deeper spiritual dimension of life.

4. Moving from Transactional to Genuine (I-Thou) Relationships

To break free from transactional living, one must:
✅ Acknowledge the full humanity of others.
✅ Be fully present and engaged in interactions.
✅ Develop relationships beyond mere utility—connecting for understanding, not just gain.
✅ Practice authentic dialogue, listening deeply, and responding sincerely.

✅ By shifting from I-It to I-Thou relationships, we reclaim the depth and meaning in our lives, recognizing that true human connection is transformative.

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